3 Counter-intuitive Tips for Facing your Fears as a Creative
For when conventional wisdom fails.
Hello Fear
Almost everyone has experienced fear in their life. Paralyzing fear. The type that curls you into a ball, that stops you in your tracks. Fear that causes you to doubt your very existence and self-sabotage.
Whether it be the fear of rejection or fear of failure, fear is one of the most common concepts that stands between us and growth or success. How many times have you “tried” starting that podcast, that business, that hobby or proposal? How, many times have you typed that phone number, or message only to convince yourself that the other person would most likely be busy?
It is obvious that no matter what you do in life, you would be met by some form of fear or the other. However, I believe that we face the greatest amount of fear when we need to exercise one of our most important human functions i.e. self-expression/ creativity.
As a writer, poet and online video content creator, I have had a crazy relationship with fear. She is like a toxic ex that I find myself running back to. I have many articles and poems unfinished and unpublished because I was too scared that my work was sub-par. I have procrastinated, self-sabotaged and binge-watched entire Netflix series (when I prefer Anime) just to escape the feeling that my work wouldn’t match up.
In recent times though, I have found myself doing more. However, it isn’t until most recently that I began to observe the patterns that allowed me to be more creative and productive. It just so turns out that these patterns are a tad counter-intuitive but I believe that that is the reason they work so well. I’m quite certain they would work for you too.
# Tip 1
Realize That You Are A Product Of Failure
Quite literally, do you know how many relationships or almost relationships your parents went through to birth you?
Okay, maybe that is extreme, but you can see the sense in that. Or maybe I should remind you that the reason you can do the most basic of tasks is that you first failed at them. You didn’t figure out how to walk, talk, eat and write without falling, babbling, spilling food, and doodling (not the pretty kind).
A couple of years ago, I enrolled in a branding course at the Orange Academy, to learn the art of brand storytelling.
At the end of the course, we were given a project to solve and defend. The purpose of the test was to examine our ability to think creatively and strategically, but, my goal was to see if I had learnt how to tell stories.
Unfortunately for me, I was among the last set of people to present. When I stepped into the room, it didn’t take much to realize that the judges had had a long hard day and were praying to be done with us. I was a ball of nerves but was determined to see how much I learnt about storytelling.
Long story short, using storytelling as a means to deliver my presentation was quite a success but there was a huge flaw that instantly derailed all my momentum and at the end of the day, I left the presentation fighting to keep my optimism. However, that day, I learned a valuable lesson on how to use stories that I believe I would never have learnt if not for that failure.
I am sure if you look closely at your life you would realize that some of the most valuable things to you came at a point of failure. The only reason they hold any positive meaning to you is that you accepted the feedback that comes with failure.
This is how we have learnt to walk, write, eat and talk. We failed and adjusted to the feedback we received. Indeed we are products of failure.
# Tip 2
Don’t Get Attached
This is a tip in the book: The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*Ck (sorry mom). Ungodly amounts of swearing aside, Mark Manson did make a strong point. If you get too attached to the significance of the work you want to do, it is easier to get bogged down by fear.
Don’t get attached to the goal that gives you fear.
When I write for competitions, instead of worrying over the prize money and if my skill is commensurate to it, I try to focus on another less scary goal. For example, I ask myself if I can write something fun with the theme given, or if I haven’t written in a while, I’d decide that the competition is a good motivator to start writing again.
It seems like I am not giving my all to the competition, but by choosing to detach myself from the goal or idea that scares me, I open myself up to doing the work and increasing my chances of winning.
# Tip 3
Go Out Of Your Way To Fail
Looking for a piece of advice that is more nonsensical than popular culture’s “face your fear” mantra? Then you are in the right place.
You may be surprised to find out that this tip is the most scientifically backed of all the others I have mentioned. In psychiatry, it is known as ‘Exposure Therapy’. For years psychiatrists have treated phobias by slowly encouraging and introducing their patients to the things they have phobias for.
Last year, I attended the Global Leadership Conference/ Summit and listened to Jia Jiang talk about how he overcame his fear of rejection by embarking on a 100-day journey of chasing rejections. He planned that every day, for 100 days he would ask someone a question that he was sure would get him rejected. In his bid to desensitize himself to the rejection, he soon found out that rejection was not all he thought it to be and soon he learnt how to turn ‘nos’ to ‘yeses’. I do not have the particular Global Leadership Summit talk, but I will leave a link to a similar talk he did at a TEDx event below.
In seeking to actively pursue the thing that scares you the most, instead of waiting for it to come to you, you speed up the process of beating your fears.
Goodbye Fear
At the end of the day, the greatest tip in overcoming fear is to realize that it is misunderstood. Our fears are not impossible barriers, they are pointers for the places that we have the most potential to grow in. By finding ways to overcome your greatest fears, you prepare yourself for a life of freedom and adventure beyond your wildest dreams.
Pause,
What unorthodox methods have you used in the past to overcome your fears?
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
-Narcotics Anonymous
